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This was a really magnanimous gesture to let your wife accompany Uncle George. Few husbands would consider that, especially under these unusual circumstances." Which unusual circumstances are you taking about," I wanted to know.She was quiet for a few seconds. I was sure she was trying to formulate her answer just right. Then she bent forward an inch or two, looked me straight in the eye and said: "It is not often that a woman uses a different name under certain circumstances." It was obvious, she knew. But how much, and just which part did she really know? How much was just assumption?? I don't like half-truths and so decided to tell her the true story. It would be better to hear it from me. "Why don't I tell you what happened," I started. "It will give you a better understanding of the relationships involved in this unlikely triangle. It was at the Grand Hotel that I accidentally overheard a short exchange of just a few words between a female and a male. She was handing the man her. I did get a free urn as a lovely parting gift, however. With one restraining each arm they began waxing poetic about the local cemetery."It's so nice, people are dying to get in," one said as the other blew layers of dust off that tired joke. It was so bad even the wolves were booing or perhaps going "Bruce" to request more Springsteen on the jukebox. I finally stepped outside and took a deep breath. It smelled like death. Either that or an Arbys was near. I then noticed I was being followed by a tall, refined-looking gent in a tweed hunting jacket.He identified himself as Winston in a sexy, British accent."Pardon me, m'lady but I heard your plans inside. I must ask, do you have a death wish?" He asked in a worried tone."No. I had the Bruce Willis remake on Blu ray but sold that stinker at my yard sale." He didn't seem disappointed nor should he be. The Bronson version is much better."If you must persist on this charade (pronounced in that silly, pretentious manner I detest) allow.
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